Only in Texas
A Texas rancher gets in his pickup and drives to a neighboring ranch and knocks at the door.
A young boy, about 9, opens the door.
"Is yer Dad home?" the rancher asks.
"No sir, he ain't," the boy replies. "He went into town."
"Well," says the rancher, "is yer Mom here?"
"No, sir, she ain't here neither. She went into town with Dad."
"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"
"He went with Mom and Dad."
The rancher stands there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself.
"Is there anything I can do fer ya?" the boy asks politely. "I knows where all the tools are, if you want to borrer one. Or maybe I could take a message fer Dad."
"Well," says the rancher uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to yer Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Pearly Mae, pregnant."
The boy considers for a moment. "You'd have to talk to Pa about that," he finally concedes. "If it helps you any, I know that Pa charges $50 for the bull and $25 for the hog, but I really don't know how much he gets fer Howard."